Salad sucks, so make coleslaw instead!

diabetes coleslaw cole slaw salad

First post of 2021. Happy New Year! Starting this year off with something that won’t kill you.

So I’ve never been strictly against the general idea of salad. But now that I have goddam diabetes, I find myself eating way too much of it.

So how do you avoid salad when it’s basically become its own food group in your annoying diabetic life? MAKE COLESLAW!

I’ve always loved coleslaw, and I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to figure out how easy it is to make at home. And oddly enough, coleslaw is (for me, anyway) sort of a “comfort food.”

diabetes coleslaw cole slaw salad
The solid white part on the bottom corner is the cabbage core. Cut that shit off!

Coleslaw reminds me of summer. It reminds me of backyard boozing. And I hate this, but it also reminds me of KFC. F**k you and your shitty but strangely delicious coleslaw, Colonel Sanders! Dick.

So I stole a recipe from from some recipe site called Inspired Taste and made some coleslaw. And it actually turned out OK! It’s honestly pretty hard to mess up.

Nobody told me how purple it would become, but I guess that’s to be expected when you have red (purple) cabbage mixed in with your everyday green cabbage.

First, here’s the recipe. I skipped the carrots, parsley, and celery seeds cuz F that. Also, I used regular salt, not fancy “sea salt.” The stuff I used is in bold, and I mostly just eyeballed the amounts.

  • 1 medium cabbage (about 2 pounds), outer leaves removed
  • 3 medium carrots, peeled and shredded
  • 1/2 cup loosely packed fresh parsley leaves, coarsely chopped
  • 1 cup (170 grams) mayonnaise
  • 2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar or more to taste
  • 2 tablespoons Dijon mustard or coarse ground mustard
  • 1 teaspoon celery seeds
  • 1/4 teaspoon fine sea salt or more to taste
  • 1/4 teaspoon fresh ground black pepper or more to taste

I’ll spare you the long-winded prep instructions. Just cut stuff up and mix the sauces ‘n salt & pepper ‘n shit! But do yourself a favor and cut out the core from the cabbage.

And now for the main event: glucose results! I measured out 200g of coleslaw and did my usual thing.

diabetes coleslaw cole slaw salad

Blood sugar reading before eating: 124

This reading of 124 was in the late afternoon … not too long after I woke up! I was on vacation, see. No need to get out of bed before 2 p.m.

Blood sugar reading after eating: 153

This reading was about an hour after I finished my coleslaw.

124 → 153 is an increase of 29 mg/dL, which is honestly higher than I thought it would be. But at the same time, 200g of coleslaw is kind of a lot of coleslaw!

The bottom line here is that coleslaw seems to be just as safe to eat as you’d expect your average salad to be.

Some coleslaw recipes call for sugar and/or honey, but you don’t need that crap! The secret ingredient is the apple cider vinegar. That’s what gives coleslaw its signature zing. The more vinegar you add, the zingier it gets.

So go make some coleslaw! And if you don’t want it to turn purple, skip the red cabbage! It’s mainly just there for color, much like the very optional carrots.

diabetes coleslaw cole slaw salad